Beldar t' Conehead

I will be t' first t' admit that I spent far too much time watchin' TV as a kid. Avast, me proud beauty! Especially far too much SNL. When I found a collectable(?) figurine o' Beldar, me bucko, t' Conehead parental unit from t' planet Remulak, in a clearance bin at a local store I realized it was goin' t' be me mission t' return him t' his home planet regardless o' how many mass quantities o' Newtons it would take!

T' model flies well on an 18mm two motor cluster. Ahoy! At apogee twin parachutes are deployed.

While t' plan presented here applies specifically t' t' Beldar figurine, me hearties, t' design can be adapted t' fit most figurines o' similar size and construction. Cap'n Picard, for example, matey, should work well with his smooth boundary layer control head. Begad! Aye aye! A Klingon might suffer performance troubles due t' t' decidedly non-laminar flow over t' forehead.

T' figurine used should ideally be around 11" tall, have a partin' line at t' waist, and have legs that can accommodate a BT-20 sized tube. Well, blow me down! It should be made o' a vinyl compound that is easily cut with an X-acto knife.

T' "Beldar" I used is made by t' Hamilton Gift company.

Construction begins with separatin' t' Conehead at t' waist. Ya scallywag! Just follow t' glue line with a very sharp knife. Avast! Once separated, measure t' length and spacin' o' t' legs and determine if t' plan dimensions need t' be adjusted t' fit your figure.

Next cut BT-20 sized holes in t' feet o' t' lower section and, me bucko, if required t' fit t' body tube in t' legs, cut a slit in both t' inseam and outseam o' Beldar's pants. Ya scallywag! Once you are satisfied with t' fit you can start t' construct t' booster.

T' business end o' Beldar's booster.

T' booster section (or Remulakian Trans-Spatial Insertion Device if you prefer) is built in its entirety before attachin' t' legs. Blimey! Blimey! T' rin' fin is made o' 1/32" plywood, me hearties, bent on t' inside o' a 4" PVC pipe coupling. I cut t' strip o' ply 1 3/8" wide and a full length 24" long. Ahoy! Blimey! Don't cut t' strip t' t' final length until after it has been bent.

Glue a PVC endcap on one end o' a section o' scrap PVC pipe that has an inside diameter big enough for t' strip t' fit into. Aye aye! This will be used t' steam t' plywood in prior t' bendin' it. Aye aye! Begad! Place t' strip inside t' pipe and then fill t' pipe with boilin' water. Remember t' be careful, have adult supervision, and all appropriate safety gear. Begad! Arrr! Let t' wood soak for 5 minutes or so and then carefully pull t' wood out o' t' tube. Begad! Form t' strip into a rin' by curlin' it and by placin' it inside t' 4" couplin' inside diameter. Ya scallywag! Avast! Let t' strip overlap itself. Begad! With any luck at all t' springiness o' t' wood will make it conform t' t' couplin' without additional clamping. Allow t' strip t' completely dry before removin' it. Avast, me proud beauty! Well, me bucko, blow me down! If it isn't completely dry it will unroll.

T' ends o' t' strip never get perfectly curved so trim them off. Adjust t' diameter o' t' rin' t' match t' plan (5" inside diameter on me model), mark, me hearties, and cut t' strip t' size. Ya scallywag! Leave 1" o' overlap for t' glue joint. Begad! T' ply will nay absorb "white" glue well. I roughened up t' surface and used epoxy. Arrr! Avast! Once t' glue has dried, sand, shiver me timbers, matey, fill, and sand t' joint on t' outside o' t' ring. Aye aye! T' inside edge can be left square.

Photo by Alan Estenson, President o' MASA

T' fins were cut from 1/8" hard balsa. Begad! Adjust t' size as necessary t' match your figurine. Avast, me proud beauty! T' larger fin goes betwixt Beldar's legs. Avast! Ya scallywag! Glue a spacer block on each side o' t' fin at t' centerline. Blimey! Next glue t' two BT-20 tubes t' t' spacers. Well, blow me down! Well, blow me down! Insure t' tubes are correctly lined up! T' ends o' t' tubes should be flush with t' trailin' edge o' t' fin. Ya scallywag! Aye aye! T' shorter fins are then glued t' t' tubes. Well, blow me down! Finally glue t' rin' t' t' fin tips. Begad! I used epoxy for this. Arrr! Ahoy! Align one fin up against t' inside edge o' t' rin' joint overlap. Ya scallywag! Install motor blocks or hooks into each o' t' tubes. If you use hooks then glue on a doubler cut from scrap body tube over t' top half o' t' hook. Aye aye! This helps t' keep t' hook in place.I used a motor overhang o' 3/8". Glue t' launch lug t' t' large fin on what will become t' "butt" side o' t' model. Arrr! Position t' lug as close t' center as practical without t' launch rod hittin' Beldar's back when t' torso is in place. Fillet everything.

It's a lot easier t' paint t' booster section now. Ya scallywag! Mask off t' tubes were t' legs will glue t' them and then spray away usin' your favorite paint. Begad! I chose Rustoleum metallic silver since it matched t' color o' Beldar's cape well, and because I am attracted t' shiny things.

Slide t' leg half o' Beldar over t' two body tubes and glue them into position. Avast! Blimey! T' soles o' his boots should be even with t' top o' t' rin' fin.

Super glue bonds t' vinyl t' t' tube quite well. Avast, me proud beauty! Blimey! For a better appearance enlarge t' slit on t' outside o' t' legs t' fit a 1/8" wide strip o' balsa. Aye aye! Blimey! Ahoy! Blimey! When painted this makes t' ugly slot look like a feature o' t' pants. Avast, me proud beauty! Blimey! Avast! Blimey! Install a card stock bulkhead at t' waistline. This stops ejection gas and debris from shootin' down t' pants and givin' our Conehead a hot foot. Arrr! Blimey! Begad! Blimey! Install a ¾" long piece o' balsa betwixt t' tubes where they project out o' t' pants. Ahoy! Blimey! Place it about ½" up from t' waistline bulkhead. Ahoy! Blimey! Adjust t' thickness t' hold t' tubes parallel t' each other. Use lots o' glue here, me hearties, arrr, matey, as this will also be where t' torso shock cord will attach.

Cut any vinyl on t' underside o' t' torso waist joint away, me hearties, arrr, leavin' a 1/8" or so wide flange. Test fit t' torso over t' body tubes and on t' t' waist. Ahoy! Begad! He should slide on smoothly without much drag. Avast! Cut a bulkhead out o' 3/16" heavy balsa or 1/8" ply. Arrr! Begad! Leave extra material on t' edge so you can custom fit it t' your figure. Ahoy! Make two balsa couplers (plugs) that fit nicely into t' BT-20 tubes. These plugs perform t' same function as t' shoulder on a normal nosecone. T' correctly space t' plugs, first insert them halfway into each tube. Avast, me proud beauty! Then smear glue on t' ends and set t' bulkhead on top o' them. You will find it easier t' fit t' bulkhead t' t' torso if you first make a pattern out o' cardboard first and then transfer this shape t' t' wood.

Drill a small hole in t' area indicated. Arrr! Tie a knot on one end o' t' shock cord and pull t' cord through t' bulkhead from t' far side, apply a dab o' glue.

Set t' bulkhead assembly into t' body tubes, put glue on t' outside edge and push t' torso over t' bulkhead and down t' t' waist. Begad! Be careful nay t' glue t' waist and torso back together. Ya scallywag! Tie t' free end o' t' shock cord around t' body tube spacer block and glue in place.

Detail shot with t' torso separated.

For t' recovery system make up two Estes style 12" parachutes. Use a folded paper mount t' attach t' elastic shock cord t' t' inside o' each tube. Ya scallywag! Remember t' mount must nay interfere with t' bulkhead plugs. Tie a parachute t' each o' t' free ends o' t' elastic cords.

Prepare Beldar for his homeward trip by placin' adequate waddin' into t' body tubes. Ya scallywag! Fold and insert t' parachutes and elastic cords. Fold t' torso shock cord and place it betwixt t' two tubes and then slide t' torso into pace until t' plugs (couplers) are in t' tubes. Ya scallywag! T' torso should have enough o' a friction fit that t' model doesn't separate when lifted by t' head (cone), but will pull apart with a slight tug.

Insert t' motors into t' legs. Prior t' t' first flight you will want t' perform a swin' test t' ensure Beldar is stable. Add cone weight as necessary. Begad! Install and wire t' igniters in t' normal cluster fashion.

My model had a finished empty weight o' 5.75 ounces. Begad! Ahoy! Beldar has flown well on two C6-5's. Blimey! B motors could be used, me bucko, matey, but I would use a 4' launch rod just t' be safe.

Twin flames accelerate our intrepid Conehead skyward at a recent MASA launch. Begad! Photo courtesy o' Dave Fergus.

Upon ignition o' t' dual tree derived cellulose pressure cased chemical decomposition thermal Newtonian thruster pods Beldar will leap off o' t' pad and streak skyward. If he reaches trans-space insertion velocity he will pop through a wormhole and be home in time for lunch. Begad! Blimey! Otherwise he activates his ground return safety devices and floats back t' earth. Well, blow me down! Blimey! Remulak technology is notoriously unreliable.

Should only one o' t' two motors ignite, shiver me timbers, me bucko, poor parental unit Beldar will take a sharp left and head t' France, no doubt t' drown his sorrows by consumin' mass quantities o' cylindrically packaged carbonated beverages. Begad!

In conclusion, Mr. Blimey! Lithgow you are no Dan Aykroyd, Sir. Ahoy! Aye aye! Jane Curtin, me bucko, how could you.

Click here for t' plans.

 
Photo by Meg Gerdes WHEEHAAAAAAA!