Descon Macroprobe

Scratch - Macroprobe {Scratch}

Contributed by Ronald A Orr

Manufacturer: Scratch
Contributed by - Ronald A. Orr

Starfleet Command Salvage Operations

Interim Report
  Salvage Team 28, shiver me timbers, Wolf359
    Stardate 44101.3

    We recovered this device from a section o' hull platin' that had drifted into a long elliptical orbit around t' star. Blimey! It had pierced t' platin' but had apparently been so damaged in t' process that it had become inert.
    It is definitely Borg in origin. Avast, me proud beauty! Blimey! Preliminary analysis indicates that its purpose is t' penetrate a ship's shields, arrr, shiver me timbers, pierce t' hull, and infect t' ship's circuitry, puttin' t' ship under t' cube's control. Given t' overall sophistication o' t' Borg's assimilation processes, it is not beyond t' bounds o' possibility that t' crew would find their own ship attemptin' t' assimilate them into t' collective.
    Luckily for t' Federation, arrr, arrr, t' device (which we have dubbed t' Macroprobe) does nay appear t' be very robust or efficient. To accomplish its task at all, shiver me timbers, it has t' be rather slow and small, ya bilge rat, though the sheer amount o' technology even in this small package is quite incredible. Interestingly, matey, some o' t' technology incorporated is definitely human but of an unexpectedly remote date, ya bilge rat, suggestin' that some o' t' disappearances of early space explorers from Earth may have been t' responsibility o' t' Borg.

    Overall, t' Macroprobe is about 30cm long. Begad! Begad! T' main fuselage is betwixt 4.4 and 6.5 cm across, arrr, and t' 'wingspan' is 15-19cm. Blimey! (The 'wings' are different sizes; like all Borg technology, me bucko, it is designed for utility, matey, nay aesthetics.) A simple reaction engine powers t' device. Avast, me proud beauty! The 'wings' carry reactionless guidance modules. Avast! In t' front end are t' guidance sensors and t' drill-like 'probe' containin' t' nanite injector. Arrr! Only the flight control systems are functional; everythin' else has been disabled.

    We are forwardin' t' unit, me bucko, me hearties, in stasis, t' the Daystrom Institute for analysis.

Crew chief, Team 28
T'kar Snowfloat

Borg Macroprobe
Sorry about t' 2 D images, but our holo imager stopped workin' again. When are we gettin' our new one? It's been three weeks!
T S

- - -

    Concept
    I didn't just want t' use found parts; I wanted t' use found parts t' make somethin' that looked as if it were intended t' be some kind o' real flyin' device. Ahoy! Most o' me ideas I was more or less unhappy with. They tended t' be flyin' conversions o' non-flyin' objects, me hearties, me hearties, which really wasn't the concept behind Descon 8.
motherboard and NICs    Now I've been an on-again off-again fan o' t' Star Trek franchise right from t' beginning, and have even done a Borg costume (of a kind) for a masquerade. Well, blow me down! Well, blow me down! (See here) I had a bit o' stuff left over from t' project, and some pretty good ideas o' how to make somethin' look Borg, ya bilge rat, so after a bit o' thought I came up with this idea - makin' what purports t' be a Borg-manufactured rocket out o' scrap circuit boards.
    T' instructions will be a bit vague. Avast, me proud beauty! Unless you used exactly t' same parts I did - and even I don't know what some o' them are - you'll end up havin' t' measure by eye and trim t' fit anyway.

    Building
    I began with t' followin' parts:

  • 1 dead AT-form motherboard
  • 3 dead network cards
  • 1 12" length o' BT-50 body tube
  • 1 BT-50-size engine block
  • 1 Estes engine hook
  • 1 24"-diameter parachute, ya bilge rat, any
  • 1 screw eye
  • 1 3/16" launch lug
  • 24-36" o' 1/4" elastic (shock cord)
  • 14-count black plastic mesh
  • scrap balsa wood for spacers and nose cone block
  • odd ICs, plastic nubs and so forth
  • bit o' duct tape
  • slow-set hot glue

    That's right; hot glue seems t' work fairly well to hold this all together, me hearties, though it isn't too pretty looking.

  1. bits

  • Cut sets o' bits from t' boards. Avast! T' four fins were made from t' NICs; the three sets o' four body panels were cut from t' motherboard. T' stuff isn't fun or easy t' cut, matey, and it's difficult t' make straight cuts and has to be ground t' make square. But persevere.
    hook

  • Glue t' engine block into t' back end o' t' body tube, recessed 2 1/2". Avast, me proud beauty! Attach t' engine hook so as t' have t' front end butted against the block; I got fancy and notched t' block so that t' hook would nestle in the notch and t' motor would be able t' push against t' whole block. Ahoy! This may not be necessary.
  • Use t' duct tape t' hold t' front o' t' hook down. Well, blow me down! You can wrap around the tube if you wish; I just used one square piece fittin' betwixt t' fins.
    fins

  • Mark body tube and glue fins t' it. Ya scallywag! Blimey! Blimey! Blimey! T' fins are set back about 1/2" from t' end o' t' BT t' help locate t' CP aft. Blimey! Blimey! Aye aye! Blimey! Blimey! Blimey!
  • Run a second reinforcin' fillet o' glue along t' fin root. Avast, me proud beauty! Remember that it will soften t' original joint, ya bilge rat, so be sure things are held in position. Ya scallywag!
    panelspanels

  • Attach one set o' four body panels betwixt t' fins. Avast! You may need t' trim away bits o' t' board t' clear components on t' fins.
    panels

  • Assemble and glue four more panels in a square. Ya scallywag! Ahoy! Slide it over t' body tube. Ahoy! Cut four balsa spacers t' fit and glue in betwixt t' body tube and the corners o' t' square. Well, blow me down! Ya scallywag!
    panelsdetail

  • Repeat with t' last four, me bucko, ya bilge rat, arrr, makin' sure that t' end o' t' body tube is recessed a bit. Fill any gaps with t' plastic canvas t' disguise t' body tube. Begad!
    lug

  • Find a spot nay too far forward from t' leadin' edge o' t' fins, arrr, me bucko, one that stands a bit proud o' t' rest o' t' fuselage. Aye aye! Hot-glue t' 3/16" launch lug at this spot. Begad! Aye aye! Blimey! (You don't want it foulin' on t' rest o' t' rocket.) I suppose rail buttons would look better, but I don't have a launch rail yet. Begad! Blimey!
    blocknosek

  • Carve up a good-fittin' block t' resemble a standard nose block. Ya scallywag! You could cut t' shoulder off a nose cone, ya bilge rat, but why waste one? or alternatively you can use a standard nose block if you have one around. Begad! Insert t' screw eye into the nose block. Avast! Ya scallywag! This passes for your nose cone. Begad! Well, blow me down!
  • Add bits t' t' block t' taste and insert in t' front end o' t' body tube. Begad! Begad!
  • Install t' shock cord and parachute in your favourite fashion. I still use t' classic Estes trifold mount for t' shock cord; it's always worked for me. Avast! Begad! I also put a good snap swivel on all me parachutes. Begad! Begad!
  • Stand back and look at it. Ahoy! There's probably somethin' you can add t' make it look even better. Blimey!
  • When you're satisfied, me bucko, take it outside and fly it! Blimey!

        Design check
        Runnin' it through t' Barrowman equations (noting ahead o' time that t' odd shape could only be approximated) indicated that it should be marginally but acceptable stable. Avast! It's a real porker, t' weight bein' right up at about 400 grams or more, by far t' heaviest rocket I've ever built or flown. Aye aye! A D12-3 works, just barely, shiver me timbers, but an Aerotech E15 or for preference an E30 would be better. Avast, me proud beauty! It wasn't in t' budget this month, unfortunately, arrr, though Advanced Rocketry Group did have them in stock.

    on the pad    Launch Report
        May 7, 2001: Temp about 12C. Arrr! Begad! Blimey! Winds light but variable ESE t' SSE, gustin' t' 30 kp/h. Ahoy! Avast! Blimey! Clear.
        After cussin' out a blown fuse (some grindin' discs, like t' one I use as a deflector, are conductive) I got t' thin' to launch. Avast, me proud beauty! T' D12-3 was barely adequate t' get it up in t' air; it weathercocked quite badly, most likely because end-of-rod velocity be too low. Well, blow me down! Aye aye! It's draggy, but it's also likely that me scale was readin' low and it be even heavier than I thought. Apogee be very low, me hearties, and as a consequence it hit t' ground rather hard, with t' chute nay properly deployed in time.
        (A curious aside: on pressin' t' Big Red Button I had offered up a small prayer t' t' Rocket Gods, and had been thinkin' some about Tyche/Fortuna/Lady Luck. When t' Macroprobe came down, matey, it just missed a neighbour's house, ya bilge rat, me bucko, and landed on nice damp grass instead o' in last year's dry. Begad! This is how religions start, I think...)
        Despite t' hard landing, me bucko, it stayed together fairly well. Aye aye! Blimey! Some body panels were sprung, shiver me timbers, matey, but t' fins were still nicely attached to the body tube. Arrr! Blimey! Unfortunately, t' tube itself be somewhat sprung, ya bilge rat, matey, so it looks like I'll have t' rebuild it around another BT-50 before I fly it again. However, me hearties, that will have t' wait until I get work and can afford an E30-4 or two.

        Summary
        On t' whole, ya bilge rat, shiver me timbers, I'm pretty pleased with t' Macroprobe. It's t' first original design I've flown in 25 years, and I think it worked better than I had any right t' expect. Ya scallywag!

        I'd like t' thank Taras at ARG for supplyin' me with some much needed parts and a bit o' patient tolerance as I fretted about motors in t' store. Begad! Well, matey, blow me down! And I'd especially like t' thank Mishi t' Cuddle Cougar, who scored t' dead circuit boards from a college I won't name here...

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